Thanksgiving puts me in the mood to say thanks to any and all things that make you go “hmmmmm”…. know what I mean? It’s the little things in life that really make me smile, bringing joy to my sugar baby life.
Things this sugar baby is thankful for:
Truvada (blue pill)- Thank you for being the first pre-exposure prophylaxis of its kind, available to men (not sugar daddies), especially men who cannot use condoms (See next item) because they sell sex, are in dire danger of prison rape, or are under pressure from partners to lose inhibitions when drunk or high. The cost? A mere $13,000 a year, and the benefit?
The Pope- Thanks for finally approving the use of condoms in some instances, like prostitution, regardless of gender; man, woman, or (somehow acknowledging existence of a third gender) transsexual. Clearly, a profound pontification for sugar babies and daddies abound.
Dictionary.com- thank you for loading your page, then somehow be able to tell me that; “Unfortunately, Dictionary.com is currently undergoing temporary difficulties to give you the definition of dire,” and to check somewhere else…yeah thanks, got it. Ha, and I thought sugar babies couldn’t spell!
Squinkies- It’s both fun to say your name and play with you. Thank you for being this Christmas’ sold out toy… Guess I’ll be heading to Fascinations instead.
F150’s (and larger trucks)- Sure, you could eat my car for a snack, but you really make me smile and giggle when you “gas it” next to me, making the statement that you will be first on the freeway, and first to the gas station, since you shat a few gallons of gas to do so…good for you asshole.
Mac- Thanks for providing a few months of fodder for T-mobile’s funny new TV commercials, where they boast about their 4G cellular network capabilities. Who cares, you’re still the best and you’ll always have the last laugh.
Groupon- Thanks for sounding so dirty and cheap, but feeling so good to use. You’re helping companies out, and, well…for putting an end to some, we all know they weren’t worth it anyway.
Fm radio- for being so terrible sometimes, that you force me into listening to public talk radio, eventually leading me to learn something like the good sugar baby I am.
MIKA- (youtube it for reference) for loving big beautiful women. If you weren’t gay, this sugar baby would let you poke me in the pooper. But since you are, we’d both have to take a Truvada, and you’d have to wrap it in rubber per the Pope to poke me.
Oh and I want to thank the kittens, for being so darn cute, cheers!
I’m Jus’ Sayin’